Have you heard that country song, “God Made Girls?” Well if you haven’t, the verses essentially state that God made girls to keep boys in check and they list all of these random reasons like, “somebody’s gotta be the one to flirt, somebody’s gotta wear a pretty skirt” and so on. My hands down favorite insight into God’s reasoning for making girls is to “give him a reason to wash that truck.”
So this song inspired a bizarre fantasy story in my mind about Rowan. I made up a story (that in my head should be the next Pixar flick) where Rowan is a famous agility dog but he pretends to be a girl because he feels that it makes people more likely to worship him as the rising superstar that he is but all the other agility dogs who are normal and grounded know that Rowan or “Rowena” is a fake. Rowan wears skirts and tutus to hide his penis on and off of the agility course. Every time “Rowena” starts his agility runs he requires his song to be played, which is “God Made Girls.” I like to picture Rowan jumping over a hurdle and right when the chorus of his song plays, “God made girls” especially when the “girls” is sung, Rowan is in mid-air over the jump and is in slow motion while his fluffy mane pulses in the wind… amazing.