I think of myself as a sort of punk Martha Stewart who also likes animals, guns, the outdoors, hockey, and a handful of other nerdy shit. One’s livelihood is everything. I didn’t get my BA in Philosophy to make money, I got it because I love challenging myself as much as possible and I want to continue living in a constant state of education forever.
One day, probably after focusing on my family for a while, I will go back to grad school and teach philosophy. I have a tremendous passion for animals and love working at a veterinary hospital. I love living on an organic orchard, because I’m nowhere near street traffic and the only neighbors I can see from my doorstep are trees and birds.
I love to read and stare at all my books. My books tell me where I’ve been, and where I am, and where I want to go. I love to cook and marvel at all the wonderful things we can do with food. Most importantly, I love focusing on my family.
Garrick is the kindest person I’ve ever met, we’ve been together for over 10 years. There are a lot of good arguments that deny the existence of altruism but nothing can deny my personal experience or change my belief in Garrick’s altruism. Also, he is crazy. For example, the first time I met him he was in the back seat of my friend’s boyfriend’s car banging his head into the car window trying to get me to laugh. Now that I think of it, he still does silly things like that to try to get me to laugh, but it usually never works. It works great on kids though.
Gar loves all creatures, he’ll treat an insect or a wild reptile like he would his own pet. He once spent an hour on our patio focused on a seemingly disabled bee he named “Mitch”, contemplating this bee’s situation and whether it was suffering. I don’t know why but birds love him, just trust me on that one. Finally, Gar is a welder and handy man extraordinaire. He has fixed everything I’ve ever asked him to fix. He is exactly the type of guy I want by my side during a natural disaster or zombie apocalypse.
Mr. Kitty will fuck you up. For real, he is the biggest cuddle bug with me but he won’t let anyone but Gar or I touch him. When Kitty got neutered way back when, he escaped from the clutches of the technicians who were working with him and got into the ceiling of the surgery suite. Eventually, Kitty had to be caught with a net and tranquilized through the net. Kitty was the first animal that was truly mine and he is so dear to me I cannot even begin to express my love for him. If Kitty were a Spice Girl, he would be Posh Spice.
Loki (aka Lokster, Lokins, Almond Roki) is the 90 lb. Lab of my life. He is a typical Lab in that he will always try and stick his head in a trash can of any sort and he can be pretty goofy at times, but I am incredibly lucky to have such a mellow, awesome dog. Loki follows us around at home all the time and he lets you do anything to him. I have nothing bad or funny to say about Loki, he’s just an all-around good dog.
Rowan (aka RowRow, Rogan Bear, psycho pants, chi-coo, door-stop, turkey) spent his childhood living with drug lords on a coca farm in Colombia. This fact is completely reflected in his personality. Rowan has two modes at home, he is either acting like he just hit a crack pipe or he is sleeping. I cannot even begin to tell you all the mischief he has caused in our household. However, Rowan is extremely cute, so it’s impossible be angry with him for more than a second.
I tell Freya (aka French Fry, Frenchie, Fryers, Frey Frey) that she is a slut (in a nice way of course) a lot because she is constantly trying to lick me. Let’s be honest, Freya is not very smart but she makes up for it by being sweet. She is incredibly sweet. She even licks Rowan’s eye boogers and Loki’s hanging mouth drool.
Stitch Murphy (aka Stitch, Stitch Murf, Murfles) is the most recent addition to our family. All I can say about Stitch so far is that he is incredibly playful and sweet. He loves the dogs, and acts like them a lot of the time. Stitch is obsessed with food, there is no food item that he has not shown interest in.